Monday, January 14, 2008

I have been having work done on my house for the last few months. There are many reasons for why I chose to do this. In a nutshell, it's a big part of what has kept me going.

I believe that Joe would like everything that I have done. Still, sometimes, I have these images flash through my mind of what it would be like if he walked up the driveway. I can see the look on his face of "what has gone on here?" and I think about taking him through the house to see what has changed. These thoughts I have are kind of scary for some reason.

All the changes to my house have been things that I've wanted, asked for, and for the most part I love everything that's been done. But there is part of me that is sad when a new project is completed. As much as I want to make things more beautiful, I sometimes feel like I just want to change it all back to the way it was before.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would live in the shack for the rest of my days if I could have him back in my life.

1 comment:

Steph said...

I think, if he did walk down that driveway, he would be so proud and happy with what you've done.

In life, he alwasys seemed so pleased with all the changes you two made over the years, turning your house into a home for your family.

It seems fitting that you would continue on with your plans for the Chalifour home. I hope that the process, as well as the completion of each project, will bring you a larger measure of joy than sadness on each new day of this journey you are on.