I have been having work done on my house for the last few months. There are many reasons for why I chose to do this. In a nutshell, it's a big part of what has kept me going.

I believe that Joe would like everything that I have done. Still, sometimes, I have these images flash through my mind of what it would be like if he walked up the driveway. I can see the look on his face of "what has gone on here?" and I think about taking him through the house to see what has changed. These thoughts I have are kind of scary for some reason.

All the changes to my house have been things that I've wanted, asked for, and for the most part I love everything that's been done. But there is part of me that is sad when a new project is completed. As much as I want to make things more beautiful, I sometimes feel like I just want to change it all back to the way it was before.

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would live in the shack for the rest of my days if I could have him back in my life.