Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Children shield your eyes

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Last night I went to bed laughing because I crack myself up sometimes. I sent my friend Jamie an email earlier in the night and I decided to post it here for a future laugh. I'm laughing about this now, tomorrow I'll probably be crying...who knows. The one thing I know for sure is that my emotions are unstable, but at least my sense of humor, as weird as it is, is not completely gone. Here is part of the email:


"I was thinking yesterday two things….One is that now that I am single I wish there was some sort of service where I could hire some asshole to sit on the couch and watch tv with me at night. That’s all I want. Nothing more than that. I’m just lonely. Second of all, in a magazine I saw a picture of an adult lady with wings who was sort of fairy-ish in an adult-sexy-kind of toothfairy way (this picture was in Country Living magazine so don’t get any ideas) and so then my mind started wandering....…you know how the terrorists think that when you die you go to heaven and get 12 virgins or whatever? Well I am wondering if Joe is with 12 virgins. Probably. Here I am pining away for him and he’s with 12 virgins. I can picture him sitting high with a long robe on and the girls at this feet reaching up to him….loving every minute of it. Robin who?"



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6 comments:

Kim said...

And the #%&hole has to watch what you want to watch:) !!!! And you have complete control of the remote. And if you want something from, say the freezer, he will get it for you. Oh, I think you are onto something Robin.

Anonymous said...

In a few years you'll be able to purchase a life sized robot to do all that...and more! Oh the possibilities!

JoAnn said...

HEY!!!
I want an asshole for my couch too!
Can we add footrubs to the list of things he does though? Please?

Anonymous said...

all right you girls. Behave! mom

Heather said...

Haha

Robin I believe its 72 virgins. HA! dont you watch Jeff Dunham? If you havent YOU GOTTA!!! It would make you laugh.

♥,
Feather

Jody said...

Robin!
Finally, you have a brilliant idea for a home business...rent an asshole! I like it!