There is an article in today's paper about the cross that was put near the road where the accident took place. I am not directly involved with this issue but the reporter did call me to talk about it. It is important to Joe's family (meaning his parents/siblings) that the cross stay there until the one year anniversary is over, and also, that they are the ones to remove it. Personally I feel that this is not an outrageous request. The cross is small, as I said before in an earlier post I went to it one day and I almost missed it because it was so unnoticable. I would like to point out that most people do not know what it is like to lose a son/brother/husband in such a tragic way and no one should judge what is meaningful to others. Although the cross is not a place where I find comfort, I do not judge where other's do. I remember after the accident people going to the scene of the accident and I thought that was so crazy....I wanted to get as far from that spot as possible. But this proves that we all deal differently and we all need to make sense with what happened in our own way. When I think about this issue, two questions come to mind and then one complex image....the questions are:
"Who complains about a cross?"
"Why can't there just be no drama and just leave it in until the one year anniversary is over and let George and Diane take it out and let it be peaceful?"
And the image that I have is of Jeff beside the road pounding that cross into the ground for his brother.....not once but twice.....and I wonder how on earth he did that. I can't imagine the physical act of doing that, and I have always pictured Joe watching him do it. The whole image makes me feel so profoundly sad, but also I feel a bond between brothers that is deep and courageous and powerful. Those bonds are what make life meaningful.